Dear Married Men Who Are ‘Just Joking’

October 18, 2020

To all the men out there who get a kick out of making indecent jokes about your married life, this one is for you.

I know you want to make people laugh. You want to capture the room with your wit. Lighten the mood during gatherings. Make people’s day with your tremendous humour.

But for God’s sake… please think before you speak and do not do it at the expense of your significant other.

Stop making fun of your wife in public.

Everyone has flaws. Your wife has some too. Maybe she’s bordering on being a shopaholic or she tends to burn everything she cooks. You do not need to point these imperfections out at Eid gatherings when you’re sitting among family. I know you’re trying to pass off your comments as endearing but they’re just rude. You are devaluing her in the eyes of the public and turning her shortcomings into a laughing matter. Maybe it’s funny when it’s your own private joke within the relationship, but exposing her flaws to the world and constantly mentioning them, is downright mocking.

Stop joking about the fact that you don’t know how to take care of yourself.

It’s actually not hilarious that you don’t know how to clean the bathroom or cook a meal. Trust me; it does not make you more attractive to your wife. The fact that she has to cook every meal, sweep every room, mop every floor – just because you never mastered these basic life skills – is not a joke. You do not come off as charming when you say you’re ‘hopeless with these things’, rather it makes people have sympathy for your wife because they know she has to do all these things for you.

Stop joking about how you wish you could get a second wife.

Sad that I even need to point this out, but the least you can do is not pass such remarks in front of your wife. Trust me, she will not find it funny. Just look at her face while you say this and you will see the disappointment, even if it’s masked by an uncomfortable fake laugh. You are making a mockery of polygamy and joking about this not only shows your lack of knowledge of the religion, but also your lack of sympathy towards your wife.

Please just stop making these jokes. You will save us the cringe and spare your wife’s feelings. Thank you.


Featured photo by Markus Winkler on  Unsplash

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